Ah, life

There is an immense landscape of thought of ethics in which wo/mankind moves. I am an explorer of that land and this is my journal. Blessings

Friday, May 12, 2006

Desire

We've been out a few times now and there's definitely some sparks going off. I find myself thinking about him alot. And thinking about what I'd like to do with him. Those hairs peeking out of his shirt keep calling out to me. Mmm how I'd like to run my hand over that chest. But I'm uncertain. Something not quite clicking there. He seems a little judgemental of others and it's not something I like in people. Or is it me being judgemental? It's been a long time since I've been with a man and I need to be sure. I'm scared.



Thursday, May 11, 2006

looking good

It's been a long hard slog bringing up two kids on my own and I've done a bloody good job. I'm very proud of my children. They're good kids with kind hearts. But it's been a lonely road.

I've known a man for a couple of years who I've been very attracted to. Because of circumstances I've kept those feelings to myself, my kids have been my priority. Thy're getting older now, 11 and 16 and so I deserve a little time out.

Just my luck one night a month ago I went out to a little town dance and the object of my attraction (M) was there too. I thought to myself it's now or never. Summoning up all my confidence (or was it the booze?) I grabbed him for a dance. Man this guy can dance and you know what they say about good dancers. And the music was some of the best on offer - Barry Charles and company - smooth and sassy. I did a bit of a Cinderella thing and split before too late, snatched a kiss goodnight and home I drove.

Tried not to think too much about it and waited for a sign. Waiting, waiting, will I phone or will I wait? Waiting. Two weeks waiting and wondering and M pulls up in my driveway. Very casual like mind you. Hey he says he had a really fun night the other night and we should go out sometime. Yes! Looking good!